Monthly Archives: September 2015

The end of “just”


I recently read an article ( which highlighted a female Apple exec urging her employees to stop using the word “just” in emails. I immediately thought it was a good idea. I realized that I tend to start emails with “I just…”.
I’m a strong female role model. I know not to apologize without a reason. I coach many of the younger athletes I work with to not constantly apologize. But I didn’t realize  how I’d seamlessly replaced the “I’m sorry’s”, with the “just’s”

It was a ‘permission’ word, in a way — a warm-up to a request, an apology for interrupting, a shy knock on a door before asking ‘Can I get something I need from you?’

Ellen Petry Leanse (Apple Exec)

Since reading this article I’ve had to delete many intro sentences to more emails than I care to admit. I don’t even work in a professional environment anymore, but I still found myself downgrading my own value and worth with a single word. Instead of lurking outside an office door hoping not to intrude, we need to use our voices to deliver our message with clear, strong words. I have committed to no longer undermining my own authority in conversations and interactions. I am also going to encourage those around me to do the same.

And I wonder if there won’t be an unexpected side effect from this transition to more positive words. Perhaps when we truly should offer an apology, or seek permission, it will be more authentic. The receiver will be more receptive and our communication will improve.

Have you found certain words or phrases that you rely on instead of using your authentic voice? What tools have you found useful to regain your voice? And has it improved your channels of communication?

Ripping the band-aid off


As a mom, I know the most effective way to get a band-aid off is to rip it off. Fast, hard, without any hesitation. The more you hesitate, the more it will hurt. I’ve tried many times to convince my children that this is true. So today, I am taking my own advice, I am ripping off the band-aid and actually starting the blog I have so many times discussed. It’s not all done, it’s not really ready. I don’t have the format totally (or even partially) figured out.

As many years as I’ve thought of doing this, and I’m still nervous. Thank you for coming here and reading my blog!

To share a little bit about myself… I am a mother to two girls. I am a personal trainer and group fitness instructor part time. I live in beautiful Michigan in a small town. My goal is to offer  a safe space to share, discuss, debate and encourage one another as we make our way through our daily lives. I do not claim to be an expert on anything, I will not try to sell you a “program” to fix anything. I am hoping to expand and nurture my tribe that I live in and continue to grow as a person.

Some of the guidelines I will use regarding this blog…

  1. I make the rules. Yep, this is my space. I invite you to please join me, share, and disagree. However, I have the right to withhold personal information. I will act to protect the personal information of myself and any readers and commenters. (Can you tell I just took a HIPAA course!)
  2. I am not an expert. Truly, not a thing. So anything I say is subject to review, and may not apply to you. But I am going to share as honestly as I can what I know at this moment in my own journey. You can digest it for yourself, and use it however you like.
  3. There will be irony and sarcasm, in droves. They are my safety blanket, and I’m not giving them up. But I will try to cut through my own walls and barriers to share real. meaningful thoughts and questions with you.

Sitting down and writing this blog is the first step in a journey I have been hoping to take for quite some time. I feel like we are all wandering through our lives, struggling to find reasons, balance, and purpose. (I often find myself simply wandering down the grocery store aisle hoping to find inspiration for dinner) And whenever I am fortunate enough to have those wonderful conversations with friends in my life that leave me renewed and invigorated, I realize we are all wandering down those same grocery aisles.

What’s for dinner?                                                                                              

Is the generic brand really any different than the store brand pasta?                                          

Should we push more after school activities or give our kids more free time?

If a kid falls and no adult sees it, does the kid still cry?? 

So please join me, share your own stories, and let us wander together!